Funny cabal - waterway sayings anybody?

[Boaty Malone]

Does anyone know any canal - waterways jokes or funny sayings? The only one I heard a while ago was if a boat is a rocking don't come a knocking.

 

Bloody hell I'm half asleep sorry about the spelling mishap I'm on my iPhone!

Edited April 23, 2011 by Boaty Malone

[RLWP]

That one is adopted from American trucker talk. "If the rig is rockin'...."

 

Richard

[bigcol]

I've had a few people keep going on about golden rivet?

 

I've asked what they talking about, and they just smile

 

Like to know

 

Col

.

[Chris Pink]

All the boats with false rivets have one that's made of gold.

 

One to add

 

'sending someone to Coventry'

[OldGoldy]

I've had a few people keep going on about golden rivet?

 

I've asked what they talking about, and they just smile

 

Like to know

 

 

Take your pick, maybe with a pinch of salt, dunno!

 

An old nautical term for tempting a new recruit to the bowels of the ship for the purpose of homosexual activities "see Roger, if you bend right over you can see the golden rivet"

 

A Naval prank played on new ship members for them to search for a golden rivet in the ships structure. Commonly ambiguous with a homosexual act as an "initiation" of the person. The latter is the generally accepted civilian meaning, however it is not referred to by anyone in the Navy, nor is the term spoken of.

 

You'll be part of the crew once you find the golden rivet.

 

A semi mythical method of inducting new recruits into the British Navy

Come below and I'll show you the golden rivet.

[tony collins]

I've had a few people keep going on about golden rivet?

 

I've asked what they talking about, and they just smile

 

Like to know

 

Col

.

 

Well it is something like this. Fellow says to female visitor, "My boat has a golden rivet".

"Can you show me?" says she.

"Yes but you'll have to get down on your hands and knees and put your head in that locker to actually see it." (are you getting the drift yet bigcol?

 

 

A friend of mine used to offer a variation of this to girls to whom he would like to get closer(!) in that a golden eyebolt was hidden in his flat and he didn't know where it was could she help him find it?

 

 

Apologies to those of a sensitive nature

Finally 1000 up.

[RLWP]

Either way, the golden rivet one is a seagoing one, not canals

 

Richard

[XAlan W]

When we first started working the system we had to go to Pooley Hall to load coal, when asked which way I was going to go to reach there .My reply as to the way I intended to go, brought forth the comment [you

[canaldrifter]

The original golden rivet in RN tradition was the belly button.

 

Remove the golden rivet and the arse falls off.

 

Tone

[XAlan W]

When we first started working the system we had to go to Pooley Hall to load coal, when asked which way I was going to go to reach there .My reply as to the way I intended to go, brought forth the comment [you`ll have a hard road if you go that way] Seemed strange at the time as it was all by water Only later did I learn working boaters usually refered to the cut as the road[ ie good road, locks for you,bad, locks against you, or a difficult stretch, shallow or rubbish filled .

[sebrof]

Apart from not touching something with a barge pole, I can't think of any.

 

Of course, the word "navvy" originated on the canals.

Edited April 23, 2011 by sebrof

[canaldrifter]

Being narrow minded?

 

Tone

[Woollymishka]

whether this is canal origin or from somewhere else .....there is a saying about if toilet contents are brown - drop them down.if contents are yellow - then let it mellow (don't flush)

I will now duck in case the ***** flies!